When these challenges enter out life we have three options.
1) We can ask "WHY ME?" be angry at the universe, god or the person we blame for our troubles.
2) We can choose to ignore the problem and hope it goes away.
3) We can look deeply into the issue and ask "Why?" what lesson am I supposed to learn through this challenge?
I always thought that if you worked hard enough, you could prevail through any challenge. One of the hardest lessons I have had to learn in my life is that you can't always win, no matter how hard you try. God knows I tried!
Once I finally learned this very hard lesson (which really made me angry, see #1) I went through the "why me?" stage. The problem with this stage is it didn't take long for me to start to wonder "why not me?". What ever problem or trauma I was going through, would I wish it on someone else? If somebody had to be chosen to endure a challenge, then I guess I was as deserving as anybody else.
I tried ambivalence for a while. I avoided problems, decisions and taking action. The crappy part of this solution is that the issue never goes away, in fact it just gets worse! That didn't work! Crap! Now what?
A much more difficult solution is understanding that you need to determine your action when faced with a problem, than you must determine your solution and act on it. After you have worked through a problem you need to take the time to understand what you learned from it.
Why was I chosen? Because I can handle it, because I had something to learn, because someday I am going to be able to help somebody else with my new found knowledge. I am stronger, better and more compassionate
because of what I have been through in my life. That is WHY.
The way I see it, if you want the rainbow you gotta put up with the rain. Dolly Parton